Marc’s last entry inspired me to post the worst song I’ve ever heard.
And that (dubious) honor goes to none other than Soulja Boy Tell ‘Em. Please note that is his full rap name. Everyone shortens it to Soulja Boy, but I feel it’s doing him a great injustice! He so clearly chose that specific name, so we must honor it. I’ll correct anyone who doesn’t.
(Can’t believe I’m wasting DivShare space for this.)
But I think there’s an important lesson to be learned here. Actually, a couple. Number one is, if you actually like Soulja Boy Tell ‘Em, you quite obviously have no music taste. If you don’t realize that this kinda stuff is actually bad for not only hip-hop, but music in general, then you don’t deserve to ever be in charge of a playlist. You shouldn’t even be able to play music out loud while driving around alone with the windows down. Simply put, other people shouldn’t be subject to your stupidity, your inability to differentiate between actual music and this shit. Yes, I realize we’ll all be subject to the occasional Soulja Boy Tell ‘Em track in the (insert frat house here) basement. That happens. It’s unfortunate, but it happens, because collectively people have no taste in good music. But if you’re to the point where you actually have this stuff on your MP3 player of choice, or are bumping it on your daily commute? You should be banned from music. Forever.
The second lesson is that auto-tune is also attempting to assassinate hip-hop. Slowly, perhaps, but by a thousand papercuts nonetheless. God knows Kanye’s last album was straight garbage (yet you clowns all bought it anyway.) And all those Weezy/Jamie Foxx/whoever the hell experiments with auto-tune as of late have been terrible as well. But at least you could stomach those. They weren’t good for hip-hop, but you could tolerate them in a crowded bar setting with lots of other distractions. This…there’s no way, no way in hell, that you can tolerate this. This is a crime against humanity. Soulja Boy Tell ‘Em should face a tribunal for this abomination. It’s beyond awful. There really isn’t a word to describe how bad the auto-tune “works” on this track. I’d say it’s embarrassing, but clearly Soulja Boy Tell ‘Em has no dignity/self-respect or else he wouldn’t have put this out for anyone to actually listen to in the first place.
In an arms dealer sort of way, I guess I am somewhat perpetuating this awful music. But only as evidence of how bad this shit really is. Please, support good music. Stop listening to this crap. I didn’t think I’d hear anything worse than Asher Roth this year. I forgot Soulja Boy Tell ‘Em was still lingering.